Heartbeat

So, will you do it again, if you can?

You want the truth?

Yes.

In a heartbeat.

***

When you say something like that, I feel like I should defend your goodness.

No, you don’t have to. I didn’t mean for it to be rhetorical.

Which is just as well. Because I no longer believe in your goodness. It will be difficult to defend something I do not believe in.

Oh.

I think you are just one of those people who need others to believe in your goodness before you can believe in it yourself.

Hmmm. I have never thought about it like that. Maybe it’s true.

I am quite sure it is.

***

I keep wondering about what I will want to say to you if I have about 16 seconds left to live. You know, like when I get into a horrific car accident and I know I will die because a truck is hurtling towards me and I can’t get my seatbelt off. It’s a total cliche but I think about it.

Why will you think about something like that?

I read an article about it. It was an overly sentimental piece. Too much of a cliche. Everything’s too much of a cliche these days.

Okay. So what will you say?

Maybe something equally cliche like “I love you”. Somehow everyone wants to say that when they’re dying. I see that a lot on TV.

Why? Because it is romantic?

No. Because it is true. And death has a way of making us truthful.

What if I’m the one to die in a horrific car crash? What will you want to say to me then?

I don’t know. I don’t think about that.

Why?

I just don’t. It’s more gratifying fantasizing about your own death anyway.

***

These are conversations that have never taken place.

Or took place between imaginary characters I made up.

Both of the above statements are true.

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