So many people want me to be safe. It is driving me nuts.

That seems particularly ungrateful of me, but it is just true. When people want you to be safe, they somehow inevitably try to scare you.

And I do not like to feel afraid.

The probability of ending up with nothing is high enough to make me feel very frightened indeed, but that is a risk I think I have to take.

Mostly because the idea of ending up with a bland, mediocre something is so much scarier.

***

For some things, it just is or it isn’t. I cannot do anything about them; they are simply out of my hands.

Please don’t make me do the impossible or manipulate the uncontrollable.

There are only so many times I can say I just don’t/can’t before I start feeling this irrational anxiety.

And then you use it against me. How is that fair?

***

This love thing, can it be eaten?

No, but it is kind of filling.

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